Ayurveda Mamma is back
In a dad friendlier format
Quick note for skimmers:
This dispatch celebrates the comeback of Ayurveda Mamma, the publication that is likely to be buried in your inbox after nine months of communication by everyone but me. For those who have forgotten: Ayurveda Mamma (PS. that’s me, Deborah Rose) believes that exhaustion is no option, and to help you prevent it, posts about self-care for Motherhood and your young on Fridays.
2023 has a few new things in the bag for you:
The divine feminine and masculine. I changed up my altar. Rather than excluding my worship (the feeling or expression of reverence and adoration for a deity) to the divine feminine, Ayurveda Mamma would also like to acknowledge the importance of the divine masculine. Men are involved in raising our young, too. Selfcare can, and, as much as I don’t like to “should” you, should be enjoyed by the whole family. From now on I will write in a way that can be applied to all.
Know thyself before thee heal thyself (and your child). In February, my membership will let go off its prenatal theme. Instead, there will be a paywall between generic self-care and doshic self-care. Those on the paid list, will receive dosha tests for each member of their family. I will draw a human conclusion for each test. The cool thing about that is that you will be able to tweak each recipe, guideline and ritual to the members in your family. This is the most cost effective way yet to work with me, and empowers you as a self healing entity more than any of my other offerings, too.
If you are currently on the paid list for 11 Moons (prenatal guidance) you will be enrolled onto the Birth Portal Course, which includes a 1on1 with me and access to my best advice lots on the third trimester, birth and 42 days after that. Of course, all content coming your way will match your Dosha.
Now, without further ado, find the full disclosure about my mute months and the comeback below 💚
My own need for Selfcare
I have always had a comfortable residency in my headspace. Teachers used to think that I was on a spectrum for various reasons. One of them was the prolonged time I needed to write my essays and finish my tests. And although no therapist has ever concluded on this so-called spectrum, my own diagnosis is that I simply wasn’t in a hurry to leave the classroom. To me, these papers were therapeutic. I carefully thought about each word whilst weaving together cryptic answers that had more in common with poetry than a school test. I never scored any points for maths.
Although my headspace is still my preferred destination, I have learned to love being in my body over the years. So much so, that I have created embodied practices to help others have a happy and engaged relationship with their body, too. Yet still, the introvert in me could never survive when my social encounters and other hands-on, embodied, work was not equally balanced with hours behind my laptop, in the bathtub or on a stroll without a goal. This is my self-care. It’s not a luxury, it’s a need. That was the thought that birthed Ayurveda Mamma two years ago. Sharing self-care with mothers, tailored to the three main mind-body archetypes. Because for each unique type, there are unique needs. The one thing all types have in common is that you can’t pour from the cup (of life, that is) when it’s empty. Selfcare is a basic need.
To make it more significant, I delivered my self-care ideas in the form of a ritual. Sometimes big, sometimes small.
But last year was different.
Where has Ayurveda Mamma been?
Preaching self-care made me feel like a fraud - so I stopped
After Covid had packed up its social distancing and bubble rules, there was a massive influx in demand for in-house postpartum healing. I erased the word “No” from my vocabulary in March. I wanted to do it all: being Nova’s mum, working with birthers, working with other healers, co-creating well-being events, representing Ayurveda at festivals and preferably moving to a sunny land or at least into a bigger house, too. I needed more physical space because my inner space was cramping up.
I gradually became more silent on all social channels. Because full disclosure: it was either sharing self-care ideas or sneaking in one hour to care for me. This care that I offered myself became repetitive. Preaching tailored and adaptive self-care now made me feel like a fraud - so I stopped.
“Where is my honey at?”
The Bee and the Rose
Those of you who have known me long enough may know that my first name, “Deborah”, means honey bee 🐝. Secondly, “Rose” is one of the few botanicals with a place in the Soma Plant bible. Soma is a mystical plant that was believed to be consumed by the gods to be immortal. In today’s language, Ayurveda refers to Soma (or Ojas) when it speaks about immune health (and fertility, and bliss). Honey, ironically, is often mentioned in the Veda’s to explain what Soma’s nectar would have looked like: a golden, aromatic, jelly-like substance. According to the texts we all possess eight drops of this nectar inside our bodies. When you feel tired, on edge or out of flux, it’s likely you have lost a drop or two.
Towards the second half of 2022, I felt all of that edge. Whilst continuing to work with birthers, and feeling temporarily uplifted after serving them with the Ritual of Ayurveda for Postpartum Healing, other aspects of my work left me feeling tired and - here comes the scary part - uninspired.
I remember laying in my bed and asking myself: when did I stop feeling alive? I was no longer aligned with my name.
Something needed to change.
I took two weeks off
I took two weeks off (I guess a 12-hour work week is considered “off” for freelance beings) around December’s solstice. It helped me to get big decisions off my plate. We’re not moving to a sunny land, nor to a bigger house. Goddess Bhuvaneshvari reminded me that because I am part of nature, Earth lives in me. Why move out, when the answer is as close as inside of me? I just needed to recreate space, right here, right now.
Microdosing and constant exposure
The first thing I did was restructure my 1on1’s in a way that gives me more leverage to focus on the clients that want to immerse - with less space for the more labour-intensive and less effective 1-offs. For the same reason, I also wrapped up my contract at the clinic in Chelsea. Working with a team of healers at that clinic was a dream come true. Breaking the contract in the same year I signed it came with sleepless nights and self-doubt. I was afraid to lose credibility when doing things on my own and, generally speaking, afraid to work alone. Afraid to say no.
The problem with 1-offs is that Ayurveda requires a microdose (or bigger dose) of constant exposure to tailored self-care. In my experience, one session is not enough for anyone to transform stubborn habits that don’t serve you into ones that bring you bliss. It would take a big effort on my end to read into the body’s subtle messages and get to know its patterns well enough to create a protocol that serves you just right in a way that is collaborative with your environment and existing day-to-day dynamics. As a result, I would give lots of tailored options and would never have the chance to adapt them in sync with the process. Also, the process would not be deep enough to heal. People looking for a quick fix are still welcome 🧡. We will just limit your protocol to the one thing I know to be effective without much effort: herbs.
The great news about this is that I don’t only have time back to nurture myself, which will keep my creative juices flowing. I also get to spend more time sharing genuine self-care practices WITH YOU. Micro-dosed, in constant weekly drops. Two keywords. The only missing keyword in this success formula is #self-knowledge. The kind that helps you pick the right practices and tweak them in a way that perfectly applies to your unique constitution. To sort that out, I am completely changing the paid membership in February 2023*.
Ayurveda Mamma’s new format celebrates families
Know thyself before thee heal thyself (and your child)
The new paid membership focuses on both you and your family. Upon signing up for a paid membership, you will receive a Dosha test for each member of your family (and yes, if your family is just you that is totally an option, too). I will personally go through each returned test and draw my human conclusion. I know that I could have opted in for an automated test, like the 101 other Ayurveda resources on the web. But because the body, mind and soul are all part of the picture, I don’t believe that A.I. can do the job as well as an engine that is made of - you guessed it - a mind, a body and a soul (me!). To help me draw the best conclusion, you might receive follow-up questions. The cool thing is that you will know each Dosha within your family, and every time when you receive the content, you will have access to the Dosha Section of the page, which tells you how to tweak each practice, ritual or recipe to the applicable Dosha for optimal results. Oh, and, when one of you (or all of you) feels imbalanced at some point down the line, you can request a follow-up Dosha Test so we can find the root cause of the imbalance together.
Would you like more hands-on guidance for your child? I offer virtual and IRL Kids Consultations. Suitable for children from 6 months up to the age of 16. After that, your offspring is welcome for a generic consultation.
The divine masculine deserves celebration, too
Another important sidenote: after receiving many requests to create practices to help the divine masculine in our families, too, I have finally decided to change up my altar in 2023. As you know, that altar (a.k.a this space) was mainly dedicated to celebrating the divine feminine. It no longer feels aligned with my practice to exclude the divine masculine from self-care. We need both qualities, and both need to be cared for. And more importantly: both energies are involved in raising our young. And since this space aims to help you raise your young holistically, I have decided to create practices for mum and dad. The fact that my own child carries lots of divine masculine energy may have played a
minor massive role in this decision 🙈. But also, working with multiple families continues to prove to me that in most households, the masculine half needs support, too.
We live, learn and adapt along the way. Probably my most effortless pitch line to describe Ayurveda yet.
*Currently a paid member of 11 Moons?
You will have received an email about your enrolment on the Birth Portal Course. This gives you deeper guidance throughout the third trimester, birth and 4th trimester than my Substack Channel has ever been able to. Of course, your enrolment will be on the house. If this memo skipped you, please drop me a message 💕.